Now I know what the true love is. Love is no labels and he was lovable where I only knew that love was only a relation between man and woman, boy and girl. Apparently he taught me that there is a true love between men and boys, it is a love in brotherhood or sisterhood. It means a lot, its love is wonderful to have it.
I will never stop be proud if
talking about him, exultant feeling to tell anyone that I was so close with him as his "young brother". I was his little brother. I had him. He made me be stronger than I was.
He trusted my capabilities, he did even more than me where actually the
person that had to do it was me. He told everyone that how proud he was about me. He told everyone that I was smart, confident person. Thank you very
much is not enough, He gave me that words in his last night on earth and now
I give him back those words “I thank you very much and it is not enough” .
To be with him is missed, to get
his scolding
is needed. I want to be the next with him like we used to. I would rather sleep
longer if he comes in my dream and maybe I wouldn’t wake up. I really want to be with
him again.
People out there maybe wonder why this boy is too
over for his grief, who you are?. You don’t know what had happened between us, you
maybe don’t know who I am, who he is. So just keep in your mind about your
curious because actually I couldn’t describe in words about why I am being like
this about his death.
I am so sorry that in the last time of his life I
had yet said that how much I love him and thank to him for being what I wanted.
But I know he knew it, thus I didn’t need to tell him how much meaningful he was.
Maybe it’s right that I had not better being sad and bawling anymore by now.
Besides he might sad as well in the sky to see me still crying about him
because he doesn’t want person crying about his leaving. I met once in my life
with person like him and it was amazing. I used to be doubt whether he loved
me or not like me but now I can not be disbelieving it.
He loved his little brother, me.
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